A CREATIVE SINGLE SOLUTION TO JOHNSTOWN’S AIRPORT SAFETY AND TRAFFIC PROBLEMS

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ARTICLE: W. Pa. airport buys shotgun to deal with turkeys

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Johnstown’s airport has two problems and a single creative solution would fix both.

723a122The John Murtha Johnstown-Cambria County Airport suffers from being in the traffic shadow of Pittsburgh International Airport; consequently, its passengers do not have direct service to many cities. They must fly to PIT for connections. They would be ecstatic if they could attract a carrier like Southwest.

The airport also has a serious safety hazard with a flock of wild turkeys. The management of JST consulted with the Pennsylvania Game Commission and the state’s organization expert in animal control recommended that the airport buy a shotgun to eliminate the fowl.

A win-win solution would be to spare the turkeys and adopt a new marketing and animal control program name.

WRONG ANSWER—the airport should adopt as its slogan—FREE WILD TURKEYs!!! As soon that message reaches Dallas, the Chairman Emeritus of Southwest Airlines (a man with a renowned sense of humor) will IMMEDIATELY launch service to Johnstown to avail himself of his favorite beverage (see above photograph). All those big jets will scare away the birds and the airport will get the much desired low fare service.

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